You can be in love at the beginning of an intimate relationship to the point you are dropping your standards and not even noticing it. There are some clear RED FLAGS you need to pay attention to. In the long run, it can be a major breakdown in the romance and it can even result in fatality. These signs are not telling you that you should play Detective and if you see 1 sign in your partner, run. It is simply a guide to guide you.
1: Isolating you from family and friends. A partner is supposed to add more value not take from you. If you find that your partner is instructing you to stay away from your friends or family, it is a clear sign of insecurity and also a BIG red flag as the first sign of abuse is isolation. No relationship should bring you the place where you are forced to be without a social life and that includes social media.
2: Heavily puts you down in criticisms. If you share your goals with your partner and they show no support, it could be that they are jealous of what that could imply for the relationship or it could mean they desire to keep you into their square so you having dreams really slapping them across their face. They therefore resort to hurtful words to put it down or act extremely nonchalant about it.
3: Intimacy is conditional. A person, once see a weakness, will capitalize on it and work it until they have full control – it simply human nature. Some men will block or cut communication with their partner when she steps out “his” box to get her back in line and for some women; they use sex against their men. Some will even resort to saying “If you love me, do these…” If you find your partner has this tendency, it is time to evaluate if you can live under those conditions or not.
4: Your past is used against you. If you are the type to share everything with your partner, you might want to first get to know the person first and allow them to earn the right to hear your story. Some men will use this against women as a means to keep them in line. For instance, a woman will tell her man that whenever she had a fight with her ex, she would go on a dates with other men. He will then use that against her should they have a fight and she utters that she needs a break.
5: Stalking! It is all cute to say yes he or she loves me because they are jealous over me but it can go extreme if not cut or kept in control from the beginning. If you see that your phone and every move you make is being monitored for no other reason than safety, you are being controlled.
A relationship is not imprisonment. Abuse is not love and it all starts at being controlling. A man is the Head and yes his woman is supposed to report to her man and yes her man out of respect and love should do the same. But when it becomes a prison cell, it is time to evaluate.